Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Girls Who Wish They Were Ke$ha

With today's release of Kesha's Animal, I felt I should point out that in one album, Kesha has presented herself as a multi-faceted pop powerhouse that will be hard to top in the coming year. Boisterous, relatable, infectious and current, Animal is a guaranteed good time. While not perfect - or particularly innovative - everything feels fresh and interesting. Which is good, since the bar has been raised for pop music after a stellar 2009. Surprisingly, she one-ups a variety of girls in the business of putting out pop music.

(Yes, I realize how horrible the moniker "Ke$ha" is. It's the main reason - other than never actually hearing the similarly ridiculously syntaxed "TiK ToK" - that I avoided Kesha's music as a whole. [I'm well aware the hilariousness of using "syntaxed" to decry syntax, too.] That and the ONTD Stan war that shapes up every time Kesha news rolls by. But I digress.)

Madonna: Madonna's last single featured Lil Wayne. Madonna, please. Don't you know Lil Wayne is both going to jail and a stale commodity? Pop music left you behind back when you decided you were hip-hop. (See American Life. I drink my soy latte / I get a double shot-te / it goes right through my bod-te / and you know I'm satisfied.) Madonna maintained success with singles from Justin Timberlake and whatnot, but the material girl has felt a little stale for an album or two now.

Avril Lavigne: Kesha has an actual edge, without relying on Hot Topic fodder wardrobe, generic interviews about being a bad-ass or faking guitar skills in music videos. While her image may or may not be as real (or as "real") as Avril, Kesha actually represents her musical persona well through her music output! Shocking!

Kelly Clarkson: Dancing With Tears in My Eyes is the lead single Clarkson wanted from her album My December. Much of Animal sounds like the further exploration of a sound Clarkson helped usher in, years and years ago before she became the stale pop tart she is now. Where Clarkson suffers from genre confusion, thinking she's much more "rock" than the blatant pop she creates - again, much like Avril - Kesha has no such issues, and proceeds to blow Clarkson's ballads out of the water.

T-Pain: T-Pain wishes he could vocode like this shit.

Uffie: I would have pegged Uffie for much more mainstream success, but her white-girl-rap-sing talents seem to have topped off with her appearance on Justice's (incredible) album Cross, with the song Tthhee Ppaarrttyy. Whenever Kesha drops into her white-girl-rap-sing-drawl, either for erotic or more playful purposes, Uffie's voice is recalled momentarily, then blown out of the water. Kesha just has so much more variety, personality and energy than Uffie's dedicated, single vocal style.

Liv Tyler: Okay, maybe not, but I can totally picture her character from Empire Records singing about half of Animal, most notably on Stephen, one of the best stalker pop songs of all time.

Fefe Dobson: Remember her? She tried really hard to be Avril Lavigne, got mired in label misery after one moderately successful single, then bowed out of that whole "popular" thing. Maybe she should try to be Kesha next.

For consistency's sake, though, I should point out three people who are entirely non-plussed by Kesha's success: Britney Spears, Lady Gaga and Robyn, the queen of pop, the princess of the moment and someone better, respectively. None of them are hurting for success, all of them have had stronger and more varied careers and releases, and in the case of Britney, it's always kind of a question as to whether she's aware of what's going on around her at all.

Thursday, December 31, 2009

Bored, Stoned, Sitting in your Basement

Ke$ha's new album Animal is equal parts Robyn, Lady Gaga, Princess Superstar, Fannypack and Kelly. Definitely grabbing a lot of the more subtle wub-wub from what seems to be popular the kid's raves these days. It's just fun, come on.

I don't understand the hate for TiK-ToK, though:



Everyone knows pop starlets need a contemporary of a similar sound and similar vision but an entirely different vision - for every Britney, there's a Christina. Ke$ha is forever paired in time and style with Lady Gaga. (This concept works for movies too: Deep Impact and Armageddon, duh.)

I mean, the lyrics read for themselves: "D-I-N-O-S-A / you are a dinosaur"? Solid gold.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Songs That Made 2009 Alright

In no particular order, and by no means a comprehensive list:



Lady Gaga - Speechless: To paraphrase Rich, if you like pop and aren't listening to Lady Gaga, what the fuck is wrong with you? As if The Fame wasn't a disgustingly strong album (full of disgustingly ubiquitous singles) the 'Ga embraced one of the most stupid-brilliant marketing tactics / gimmicks by re-releasing the entire album with an all-new EP as a bonus. (Extra bonus for including the Lady of the 00's, Beyowulf herself, while one-upping her own re-release tactic.) Speechless stands out as one of the more honest, traditional songs on the seven track Fame Monster EP, and it only serves to highlight the more cutting edge pop of other tracks. Don't call me Gaga. She ate my heart.



Drake - Best I Ever Had: Too bad this song was played every six minutes on every other radio station - the chorus is the most romantic I've heard in a long time. The entire So Far Gone mixtape garnered such scary buzz, made even scarier by the fact that it deserves it. Beats that sound like what music would've been tomorrow if Drake hadn't done it today, lyrics that easily hold their own, if not surpass lyrical greats Drake openly admires, and a romantic honesty that doesn't sacrifice image, sex appeal or artistic quality. And yet still, he's always Wheelchair Jimmy to me.



Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Skeletons: The lyrics are kind of a bunch of bullshit, but Karen O uses her pretty soaring vocals in a way I've missed since Fever to Tell. It's Blitz, while not an amazing album overall, felt more like the scattered-yet-cohesive explosion of experimentation that was Fever to Tell, with Skeletons playing the role of Maps. One repeated line - "love, don't cry" - sells the vocals beautifully. I can't help but imagine standing in a barren suburban field, just after sunset, watching distant street lights blink on under a sky fading from impossibly silver to salt and pepper stars.



Eminem - Insane: One of Eminem's most fucked up songs ever, with an equally insane beat. Dr. Dre was in top form for Eminem's entire comeback album, and this track displays one of his more impressive creative efforts. I can't even begin to explain how I feel about Eminem. Best. Lyricist. Ever.



Regina Spektor - One More Time With Feeling: Soaring, inspiring, and interesting, everything I could ask for from Regina Spektor.



La Roux - As If By Magic: La Roux's debut album caught me off guard entirely, and every track seems to speak to a specific time, emotion and experience in my specific life, while still being a grandiose enough concept to be universally applicable - the basis for an incredible pop album. This lower-key number near the end of their album spins me off into a bittersweet - melancholy - part of my brain, the part responsible for remembering the outlines on someone's face when you know you can never see them again.



Placebo - Kings of Medicine: Can Placebo not write a song that isn't about bitter jaded lovers, drugs, and... bitter, jaded lovers?



The Dead Weather - Treat Me Like Your Mother: I love seeing Jack White play around with an evolved guitar similar to the crunch of the White Stripes' Blue Orchid.



Matt and Kim - Daylight: It's so rare to see a song, a band, an entire album with such a distinct and defining drum sound, especially one as sparse and loud as on much of Matt and Kim's debut. "Matt's" semi-monotone drawl somehow sounds like the polar opposite of other drone-vocals of recent years - Interpol, Raveonettes, I'm looking at some of your junk - they're upbeat, full of hope, a welcome, come in, sign, not the depressing dull ache I'm used to from similar vocals.



Fagget Fairys - Roll the Dice: The bassline on this song - and many of the songs on this debut - are insane. Give me more thwhub-whub-whub-whub-whub-whub, please.



Say Anything - Crush'd: I hesitated to list Crush'd over their more loveable and honest Mara and Me, a confessional about singer Max's sardonic attitude that evolves into a love song for his favorite girl. This one is just another silly love song - the follow-up to Mara and Me. Gets stuck in my head for weeks at a time, still.



Dizzee Rascal - Bonkers: Dizzee Rascal's insanity anthem was one of the defining moments for me at this year's Electric Daisy Carnival. I already loved the song, and Benny Benasi spun it while we were making our way towards the stage at the center of the L.A. Colisseum, through the jam-packed tunnels of rolling teenagers, frolicking stoners and half-naked love-prepared pure-hormone dancers. The bass rumbled through the concrete above and below me, the sharp snare cracked the air, and I knew I was about to go apeshit. Then I did. Fantastic.



AFI - End Transmission: God help me, I love AFI, and Crashlove is one of their best albums to date. Moving even further towards pop seems to be their strength.



Dethklok - Dethsupport: "Say. Your Good. Byes. / That. Was. Your. Life." Maybe my favorite lyric of the year. Dethklok is so fucking brutal I can hardly stand it. I am the future Mrs. Nathan Explosion. (Or the future Mrs. #22, for the record.)



Peaches - Talk to Me: Peaches' howl was exactly what this album needed to open with, and a brilliant choice for first single.



Major Lazor - Mary Jane: Otherwise a somewhat ho-hum album, which was a true disappointment coming from the all-star hip-hop / dancehall DJ tag-team of Diplo and Switch, this track stands out. And not just because I got that purp fired up. (Or that Patron in my cup.)



Imogen Heap - Half Life: A fantastic album and one of the more powerful songs I've heard out of the lovely Immi. An honest exploration of modern communication and love, and what of each is enough.



Bjork - Declare Independence (Ghostdigital 12" Mix): Bjork's Voltaic remixes album presented some unexpected surprises, though the tracklist was somewhat disappointingly unvaried - a handful of remixes of a handful of songs. I get sick of hearing Declare Independence and Earth Intruders when listening to the album as a whole; it clearly seems to be presented as a "find your favorites" listening experience, instead of anything with cohesive flow. That's okay - everything here is pretty good, and some of it seems more like Bjork than the originals. Girl needs to get some of her weirdness back and quit relying on guest spots and kooky vocals!



Wale - 90210: The best of what seems to be a trend in rappers seeing girls for what they are, The Best Kept Secret both coddles and annihalates the Hollywood slut stereotype without glorifying any of the vulgar bits.



Miley Cyrus - Party in the U.S.A.: The oblivious little strumpet had one of the damn hottest singles of the year, despite essentially not knowing what the song was about. (That and her being a Monarch mind control slave.)



Two Tongues - Tremors: Max Beemis' second song on this list, from a surprising album - Chris, the singer from Saves the Day, and Max, the singer from Say Anything, sing a bunch of love songs in the form of a duet, without it sounding blatantly gay. Or maybe it's the kind of gay I love, where they don't have to outright state they're singing to each other? Or maybe I'm reading into it because I love Max Beemis too much? (Sorry, Mr. Boyle, I know I may be your future wife, but I gotta flirt around, doll.)



The Lonely Island - Like a Boss: Suck my own dick, like a boss.



Rihanna - Rude Boy: The only good track off of a muddle, uninteresting album. I love chicks who love rough sex.



30 Seconds to Mars - Vox Populi: Epic. A perfect representation of the general voice and intention of This is War, finally being released after almost five years of touring and recording and legal bullshit. A surprising amount of "brothers and sisters in arms" are present in the form of a sporadic but ever-present chorus of voices used as a brilliantly flowing battle cry.

I can't stand to see you cry...



Rollin' with the homies... R.I.P.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

I need roadside assistance...

Lil' Wayne's new album may be the first piece of dump 2010 can run aground of. I'm not even sure when it's supposed to be out - originally last January, then December, then it leaked and now I hear he's pushing it back to April for unknown reasons? Possibly to re-record material, or record new material, or hopefully make it not trash?

I thought Wayne's popularity was based on his stellar work ethic and rhyme, coupled with somewhat-fresh beats. This entire "rock" album is a joke - the music is phoned in Guitar Hero on Easy rock (yes, yes, I used that same complaint in my Muse review - if Wayne can trip repetition all over your speakers, I can do the same on your internet) and the lyrics are nothing but trash. He pulls out a ton of tried-and-true-and-horrible cliches, like "all that glitters isn't gold" or some shit. I'm not even bothering to look up the lyrics right this second.

Honestly, Mr. Lil. I thought you had thousands of workable lyrics just floating around your head and recording studio, so why this uninspired, useless album of stereotypical hip-hop-meets-rock bullshit?

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

I'm going to pick up the world, and drop it on your f*cking head.

Just heard a sick single by Lil' Wayne featuring Eminem. Two greats = great song. Peep it.

Friday, December 11, 2009

We were the kings and queens of promise

Watching 30 Seconds to Mars on Conan tonight, and I feel like this is a perfect time for a guilty pleasure admission - Jared Leto is so fucking hot my pants barely fit every time I see him performing. I love 30 Seconds to Mars a ton.



Just sayin'.

Thanks to Oh No They Didn't for the video, and for being the best community of all time.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

An Open Letter to Dr. Dre

Dear Mr. Dr. Dre,

I am not a huge fan of your work as a lyricist. I think you glorify a culture that deserves to be vilified while profiting hugely off of your own personal pain and suffering, as well as the pain and suffering of others in the "game." That is unfortunate, but I don't decy your right to express yourself in such a creative light.

That being said, your production capabilities are nothing short of astounding. Your reliance on your own musical growth is beyond admirable and presents albums that are truly iconic works of art within hip-hop, music and the creative world as a whole. Albums such as Easy E's Easy Duz It and your own Chronic and 2001, songs like Eve's Let Me Blow Ya Mind, 50 Cent's In Da Club, Busta Rhymes' Break Ya Neck, and everything worthwhile Eminem has ever realeased... that shit is beyond dope. It's elevated to a level other artists can only hope to match, in scope, candor and vision. They are all, also, very much so "you," without becoming a stale, forgotten sound. Your recent work on Eminem's Relapse / Refill is shocking and refreshing in a world where mainstream hip-hop is dominated by trashy house bullshit and uninspired R&B.

All of that being said - where the fuck is Detox?

Your long-awaited followup to 2001 is already considered the hip-hop equivalent of Guns 'n' Roses' interesting disaster Chinese Democracy. You've had been talking about a concept album, but in a hilarious twist, I can't help but note that article's statement about the album Detox being released "next year" - but that article is from 2002! We're moving into a new decade - you've been discussing releasing this album for ten years, and have seen release dates pop up in 2003, early 2004, 2005, 2007, May 2008, November / December 2009... We've heard about thirteen track albums with numerous singles, we've heard Ice Cube say he's on the album, but then that no N.W.A. members were on the album.

As it stands, it's looking more and more like Detox is going to become this decade's Duke Nukem Forever. That's really too bad.

Love,

Hip-hop fans.

P.S. Please devote more time to your music and less time to designing ugly, expensive headphones. The world doesn't need more headphones, especially ones made by companies as shady and rude as Monster.